Thankful All The Time

We set aside one day of the year to gorge ourselves on rich food and remember how thankful we are for said food, and football, and family.  (In some cases, not the family, so much.)
Yet, wouldn't it make life more pleasant all around if we were thankful every day for something in our lives?  How about coffee?  I could see a whole bunch of hands go up in the air if I asked on a Monday morning, "Who's thankful for coffee?"  The fact that we can brew or buy a cup of nice, hot, caffeinated goodness gets many of us through the very tough prospect of facing the new day. (I mean, let's face it, some of us are night owls, and morning, especially EARLY morning, just sounds like a bad idea.  Especially if it involves leaving bed and having to think clearly.)

How many of us stop to think how very fortunate we are in this country that MOST of us can get up and brew that coffee, and have something to eat with it?  There are plenty who can't, even in this country.  Which is awful, and something that we need to work on.  (And think about those who don't even have a bed to sleep in, or a roof overhead.  On the whole, as a society, we are pretty spoiled.)

What about Wi-Fi? Or cell phone service for your smart phone?  Ever think about how many people can't afford that?  It isn't cheap.  Most of us accept the expense because it is so difficult today to conduct life without the smart phone or at the least, the computer with a high-speed Internet connection.  Sure, there are cheap, pay as you go plans available, but most people who are financially strapped can't even justify that expense.  I can see an awful lot of hands go up, my own included, if somebody asked "Who'd be lost without their smart phone?"
In the first place, I am thankful to be alive in the time when this technology is ubiquitous and useful.  In my youth, if we had told people that these devices and services would exist, they would have sent us off for mental evaluation.  They would have told us we were dreaming.  (They should have known better than to tell Star Trek fans something couldn't be done.  We now have communicators, we almost have medical scanners, can phasers and warp drive be far behind? Trek fans will always take up a challenge!)
In the second place, using the technology helps keep my mind sharp.  I need to be able to figure out new things quickly, and having the phone and all its multitudes of apps to master keeps me on my toes!  It has helped at work by making it easier for me to adapt to hardware, software, and procedural changes. 

How many of us take music for granted?  The background of most movies, tv shows, even life itself, as various places we go and people we interact with have music playing in the environment.  Music is a very big deal in my life, and something I give thanks for every single day.  Both making it and listening to it are joys that I cannot live without. 

Of course, everyone (or nearly everyone) says they are thankful for family and friends at Thanksgiving.  Every day, the people who must live with you, put up with your quirks, work with you, look at you, are there.  Nearly every one of them does a good job of living with you, making allowances for your quirks, and working with you.  Some of them even love you.  That's a wonderfully miraculous thing.  It's something I give thanks for constantly.  That my husband is always there, always loving me, that my coworkers actually seem glad to see me when I come in to work, that I have friends who willingly spend time with me, my life is so full and so rich because of them.  It makes me happy to try to give that joy back by appreciating them and being there for them no matter what.  (Though most of them are nowhere near the Prima Donna pain in butt that I am!  I'm the Baby, gotta love me!)

It seems there is a lot to be thankful for.  Perhaps one day to stop and actually acknowledge the fact is a good thing.  I hope it remains that, a day to stop and reflect and give thanks for all the many good things we have in this world.  It is in danger of becoming a day to either shop, or prepare to shop, for yet more stuff that we don't really need.  I am very thankful to live in this country, I believe our system is one of the best, and our history may not be untarnished, but it shows a people who learn, who grow, who change for the better, usually. I am concerned though, by the whole atmosphere we seem to be living in that seeks to divide people, categorize people, encourage people to keep consuming.  Some days I wonder if we have been transported to one of the many dystopian societies that were featured in the science fiction I read as a teen. 
When those moods strike, someone will inevitably post something cool and hopeful, or better yet, some little kid will show up at the library all jazzed to be there, and happy about getting books to read.  Makes my whole day. 
I am thankful for this life.  I do not take it for granted, not any of it.  Some days it's hard to express this. So I hope if others are like I am, that that they actually take advantage of the day set aside to be thankful, and reflect on more than just their overstuffed tummy or what sales they plan to hit.
Happy Thanksgiving.  I am thankful to you for reading.

Some Thoughts On Recent Headlines

I think everybody needs a hug today. Those people who rioted in Ferguson are not typical, nor are the police whose us vs them mindset started this whole catastrophe, which was exacerbated by the media pandering to the "if it bleeds, it leads" mentality. This whole business is just sad, sad, sad. Glad Dr. King isn't here to see it. This would disappoint him so.
It makes me that much more grateful for local police who reach for their can of mace or their baton before they reach for their gun, unless they are certain the person facing them is armed. (I've seen them at work, I know. The gun is the last resort with our guys. )
The idiots who seemingly delighted in an excuse to destroy almost drowned out the touching and far wiser plea of the Brown family. Violence and hate cannot drive out hate. Only love can do that, as Dr. King said. The Brown family is pleading for people to find ways to effect CONSTRUCTIVE change. 
 So sad that we have not traveled further from the days of my early childhood, when people of color finally stood up and said with quiet determination "No more." No more will our young men be hung on trees like grotesque ornaments for no good reason other than that they happened to be the wrong color in the wrong place at the wrong time. No more will we allow ourselves to be shoved to the "back of the bus", or excluded from common facilities,or denied rights that are deemed fundamental to all humans.

We have made some            progress, yes, but there is still SO far to go. We need to learn to see each other as humans first, inconsequential differences of exterior appearance becoming just that. 
It is not the guilt of only one group. We ALL need to stop deciding someone hates us, or we hate them, based solely on appearance. Not every dark face belongs to a hoodlum. Not every light face belongs to a racist who seeks to harm those who are different.
 Again and again we ignore the words of all those leaders we purport to follow. From Jesus to Gandhi to Dr. King, we refuse to love our neighbor as ourselves, to do right even when others do wrong, in fact, most sadly, we don't love ourselves. I think that is the true basis for most of the trouble in this world.

  
For the sake of all of us, I hope we learn.   

Yes, I Am Still Alive...

I'm just busy! 
Found some free book cataloging software that syncs with Goodreads, so I am scanning and cataloging the home library.  Also need to weed a few entries out of the database, because some of the stuff Goodreads got from Amazon is way out of date. Lot of that stuff is not in the collection anymore. Yep.  I'm such a geek that I like to do library stuff with my OWN BOOKS.  (Not enough that I keep track of hundreds of items daily at work by checking them in or out, sorting them, reshelving some of them.  Nope.  Gotta organize the chaos at home, too.  )

Something I discovered in my in-depth travels through the bookshelves, piles, and double-stacks here is that I do have at least a rudimentary organizational scheme in place.  All the writing and writing reference books are near each other, history and travel and anthropological books are near each other, poetry, grammar, and foreign language aids are also pretty much together. 

The Goodreads app drew in most of my digital collection as well.  I don't know if it sees all the things on my Nook, but it has the Amazon titles, including ebooks, that I have.  Some of the titles on Good reads are things I have on the Nook that I have put on Goodreads manually.  This project is going to involved a lot of dealing with getting databases to play nice together.

Even though it seems like it should be work, this process has allowed me to renew my acquaintance with some old friends, like my Longfellow anthology, the Burns anthology, and the Oxford Book of English Verse, (1250-1918) .  Some of these old friends were finds from the old used book store my sister used to take me to haunt in Santa Monica when I was a teen, and she and my brother in law were living just off of Wilshire in Santa Monica.

I am not even half way through my office, let alone the living room shelves and the cookbooks, and I already have 402 books cataloged. (Admittedly, some of them are artifacts from Goodreads that need to be deleted, but still, that's a LOT of books!)

Is it any wonder I work in a library?  Books are part of my natural habitat! More adventures in cataloging the home collection will be posted as I progress.  I dread the credenza.  It is double stacked, and the drawers are full of books, too.  Sigh.  I shall have to weed as I go, judiciously, of course!

 Still trying to figure out if my whole Nook library can be synced.  Somehow I doubt it.  Will have to enter those manually through Goodreads, most likely.

Wait! It's Not Supposed To Be Winter Yet!!

Early Winter
By C.K. Armistead
Nov 16, 2014

Freezing air that greets
My reluctantly waking feets
I pull them back under the sheets
While the alarm clock uselessly bleats.

Seeking warmth, I hit the shower
Hot water seems to take an hour
Before it gets to its full power
Helping sweeten my mood so sour.

Joints that normally don't pain me
Today rebel and seek to blame me
For the cold that seems to contain me
Making them all inflamed, you see.

Oh, the joy of my cozy nook
To curl up and read a book
A window to help me look
Upon the trees by cold winds shook.

  

Winter Signs on A Fall Afternoon
C.K. Armistead
Nov. 2014

Swirling, falling drifting
Lightly dusting and sifting,
Flakes flying on north winds
Coating shrubs and ground again.

Fluffing, chattering, then still
Sparrows huddled on my windowsill.
Waiting for a decrease in the wind
So they can go after the seeds again.

The singing kettle, the bubbling pot
On the stove, making a lot
Of good things to drink and eat
To take our minds off of snow and sleet.

To keep the cabin fever away,
Time on the elliptical to bob and sway
Also burning as much as I should
Of all that good and hearty food!

So, it isn't even Thanksgiving yet.  It is usually nowhere near this cold here this time of year.  Fall is usually the nicest time weather wise in Oklahoma.  I'm glad they switched from "Global Warming" to "Climate Change", because Climate Change is more descriptive of what happens as the earth has these temperature cycles.  It has happened before.  With or without man, our planet goes through changes.  Oh, we probably make it worse, but it isn't ALL on us.  The geological record upholds that fact.  The problem is, we ARE putting more chemicals, particles, etc into the air than would otherwise be there.  It DOES do nasty things to the planetary environment.  So, we do our little part to help curtail some of it.  Walk to the store instead of drive if I can, recycle everything I can. (But I have to drive to the recycling center.  That kind of rankles...)
My plans for today include making some more home made applesauce, and a batch of shortbread.  I also want to try to make some little meat pies with the egg roll wraps we have left.  (Not as fattening as pasties, but maybe ALMOST as good.  We'll see...)  The laundry is almost all done, including the towels.  I need to make out a grocery list and pay some bills.  Also praying for the weather to not leave us with a real mess on the roads in the morning.  (I'd like to do my shopping and get it all put away before I have to leave for Voice.)

Looks as though the roads will be iffy for quite a bit of tomorrow.  The schools are going to be closed.  (Oh, joy.)  May have to shop Tues before work.

Just feel so run down and tired and vaguely irritable during this weather.  Never fails to show up when I have other stuff to do! 

Here's the dessert I made tonight:

So, now that I've put my big, cozy sweater on, and had a bowl of this, I'm full and I'm SLEEPY!  Catch you later!

Friends Out Of The Ether

A couple of weeks ago
, I went to a Halloween party.  It was also a "club" meeting of sorts.  I got to meet two more of my online friends in person, and reconnect with two others.  That's the five of us in that picture, with me in the middle, evidently discovering something in Easy Street (the Hard Way) that I missed the first time.
Yes, we are some of the #Perlgirls.  We are all fans of Ron Perlman, and most of us have met him.  The fact that we have other interests in common, and that we have fun whenever we get together made this a very interesting weekend.

So much of social media is dismissed as being phony or shallow.  Well, some of it may well be, but sometimes you find real and wonderful friends there.  I have.  These ladies are dear to me, we've had long online chats, and now, in person chats.  We've laughed together, and pulled each other through sad times, too.  All because we found each other due to our mutual affection for a certain craggy faced actor with a warm, loving heart.

The trip was fun, but also a bit stressful.  My husband and I had a six hour drive to Austin for the party, and I-35 is VERY much under construction in many places along the way.  I am thankful my husband is such a good sport, and such a good driver  After all, these weren't HIS friends we were going to meet. He did enjoy himself though, and both of us met some really fun and interesting people at that party.

We have decided that while we think Austin is a beautiful city, we also find it to be one of the most confusing places we've ever been.  With all the road construction going on, it is VERY easy to get lost.  (At least for us.) The sad saga of us ending up at the wrong hotel the first time, and TWO long, frustrating treks through rush hour and construction congestion is best left at that.  It was probably my fault.  I probably touched the wrong address selection on Google Maps when offered the options. Everyone we met in Austin was friendly and pleasant, and even the crowds we encountered seemed good natured and easy going.

We had a nice trip home, once we got clear of the last big construction zone.  We made our traditional stop at the Davis CTS so we could buy some more Bedree chocolate.  (Also,  that must be the nicest, cleanest, friendliest travel center on all of I-35.)  Anytime we travel that far south on I-35, the CTS is a mandatory stop! As always, the familiar sights near home are always welcome after being away.  Perhaps it is because I hadn't been back home all that long after my last trip away before going on this one.
Most remarkable thing about my trip was that I traveled to another state for a whole week earlier this month with just my small carry-on bag and my purse.  For this trip, because it involved a costume party, I had my small carryon, my makeup case, a garment bag, my laptop bag, and two shopping bags.  When I have to get all dolled up, I need LOTS of backup! (Well, I AM over 50, and spackle, I mean makeup, takes up a lot of space.) Didn't need any makeup to go do yard work at my Mom's.

I've been letting this post marinate for awhile.  I knew I wasn't quite finished, that there was more I had to process and percolate before I could finish it. 
One big result of the preparation and completion of the costume for this trip is that I have started caring about my appearance again.  I had been being lazy, and truthfully, rather depressed about my aging self until this costume caused me to work with makeup again.  I have to make the time to put it on, and I have to take better care of my skin, but those are things I used to do all the time, I just gave up awhile back. 
Since meeting these ladies, and especially since reading Ron's book Easy Street (the Hard Way) , I have been conscious of all the things I stopped doing, and examining the REAL reason I stopped.  I didn't stop using makeup because I really decided I looked better without it, I stopped because I got lazy.  I decided it didn't MATTER how I looked, I didn't matter that much, nobody looked at me.  Did not even realize I had been thinking that way until reading Easy Street made me look at how I've been dealing with life. (Or rather NOT dealing with it.)  Since I've started this process, I've been more careful about choosing the things I do or don't do.  I have to clean out more stuff around here as part of all that.  Matt and I both need to cull out the junk that is cluttering up our lives (and our house!) 

I find that caring about my appearance gives me more confidence, I feel more capable.  I know it doesn't really change anything, but the psychological boost is real.  Working out and taking care of my body has been making big changes in how I feel about myself for more than a year now.  I have managed to lose and keep off about 25 pounds.  I lost more than 30, some crept back on, and I am in the process of losing it and keeping it off.  But this is the longest I have sustained a weight loss ever. 
I am stronger, have more stamina, can sing better (when my sinuses cooperate!) and I look better than I have in a long time!  I have less energy on the days I don't exercise, and I find it harder to fall asleep on those days, for some reason.

Last week some dear friends told me they'd seen a change in me over the last few years, especially since I started doing really well with the voice lessons.  Perhaps the fact that I had found something I could stick with, something I felt real joy doing, gave me more confidence.  I don't know.  Always before in my life, there would be something I would prepare for, and try to do, and fail at.  Singing became a source of hard work that paid off.  It is spilling over into other parts of my life now.  I am taking on more challenges at work, I am writing more, too.  Also, even five years ago, I probably wouldn't have made the trip to Dallas to meet Ron, let alone this trip to Austin to meet the other girls.  There just seems to be more of a willingness to do things and try things than I've ever had before.  I had become very risk-averse, and while I still wouldn't want to make any BIG changes, I at least have the courage to take the small steps.  I was frozen before.

So, thank you to Karen Smith-Pearson, my voice coach, for helping me find out that I DO have a voice, and that it is worth hearing.  Thanks to my long suffering husband Matthew, who has put up with all my fears, trepidations, and enthusiasms for more than 30 years now.  Thanks to the rest of the #Perlgirls, especially Mary, Kelly, Jana, Fi, and Mallory for helping me break out of my shell a bit. 
Thanks to the man himself, too.  The light you shed on this world reaches farther than you think, Mr. Perlman! 

The Owl Woman

For All The Saints

This Sunday is the day our church celebrates all the faithful who have gone before us into that unknowable land beyond this world.  We remember them, the ways they touched lives while they were here on earth, and how their examples and deeds continue to touch lives. 
Not just the "official" saints, but the everyday saints, the ones you probably have in your own life. 
We remember Sunday school teachers we have known, family members, neighbors, friends, people whose love and caring influenced our lives.  We remember them.  They live on, both in that land beyond, and in our hearts.

After the service at church this morning, I found a text from my sister telling me that our aunt had passed on into the nearer presence of God.  We were afraid this was coming.  She had been very ill, and had lost interest in things that she used to be very involved in.  Not a shock, but still a sadness.  Won't get to hear her heavily southern accented voice again, she won't hug my neck again in this life.  But she is still with me.  She lives on, just as my Pop, my Uncles and cousins who have gone on.  The impressions they made on the lives of others live on.  They are remembered, and remembered with love.

There is a movie out right now that I highly recommend, especially to those who have recently lost a loved one.  The Book of Life is a lovely tale, well told, of love and loss,  and the triumph of love.  In this movie, the afterlife is explained as containing two kingdoms.  Not Heaven and Hell, as we sometimes think of them, but the Land of the Remembered, and the Land of the Forgotten.  The Land of the Remembered is colorful and beautiful, and there are fiestas every day.  The Land of the Forgotten is bleak and colorless, and everyone  there is very quiet and sad.

My aunt will forever dwell in the Land of the Remembered.  She touched SO many lives.  In the town she (and for the last 20 plus years, my Mom) lived in, she is surprisingly well known.  People knew we were relatives, and on our last visit, my sister and I were asked repeatedly how our aunt was doing, and heard many stories of how very much she is loved.  Nearly everyone I met in that town who knew her, adored her.  She was so loving and giving, and until very recently made birthday cakes for LOTS of the people in town.  She taught Sunday School at one of the largest churches in town, and there are legions of former students who will never forget her caring and her teaching. 
All of us in the family will remember her with love for the many wonderful vacations we spent being overfed and spoiled by her.  I have a few recipes that she gave Mom over the years, and all of the congregation of the 11am service at St. Paul's Cathedral in Oklahoma City should call her blessed, because she gave me the recipe for Sausage Balls.  Nearly every time Matt and I did refreshments for the "After the 11" fellowship, I took Sausage Balls.  If I didn't, there were disappointed people who always looked forward to them.  So, all my fellow St. Paul's 11 o'clockers, please say a prayer of thanks for the life of Margaret Smyly, who helped teach me how to always bake with love.

On this day set aside in the church to remember those gone on before us, please think about those folks that you remember from the past, not just family, but friends, coworkers, teachers, anyone who made a difference, however small, in your life.  Remember them, say a prayer of thanks for their lives on this earth, and thereby know that they always dwell in the Land of the Remembered.

I leave you with the words to this hymn we sang today at a baptism.  It is a bit saccharine, but the last verse is so very true.  There are hundreds of thousands still today who do the right thing, the good thing, the difficult thing, the thing Jesus asked his followers to do.  They love their neighbor and show it in their actions.  Like my Aunt Margaret.  May we all do the things that will keep us in the Land of those Remembered with love.


I sing a song of the saints of God,
Patient and brave and true,
who toiled and fought and lived and died
for the Lord they loved and knew.
And one was a doctor, and one was a queen,
and one was a shepherdess on the green:
They were all of them saints of God - and I mean,
God helping, to be one too.

They loved their Lord so dear, so dear,
and his love made them strong;
and they followed the right for Jesus' sake,
the whole of their good lives long.
And one was a soldier, and one was a priest,
and one was slain by a fierce wild beast:
And there's not any reason, no not the least,
why I shouldn't be one too.

They lived not only in ages past,
there are hundreds of thousands still,
the world is bright with the joyous saints
who love to do Jesus' will,
You can meet them in school, or in lanes, or at sea,
in church, or in trains, or in shops, or at tea,
for the saints of God are just folk like me,
and I mean to be one too.

Words by Lesbia Scott
From the Episcopal Hymnal 1982, # 293