Sunday, September 28, 2014

Poetry In Progress

 A couple of things that have been running around in my head lately.  One actually made its way almost complete onto paper before I got here with it, the other had to be extracted on the spot, and I still may tinker with them both in the future. 





Seasonal Changes
By Carolyn Kay Armistead
September, 2014

Already the light
Is from a different angle,
Has a different character,
A different feel.

Already the sun is less intense
The breeze a bit cooler,
The shadows longer.

Some of the trees are
Already beginning to
Turn a bit gold
Only on the edges.
It hasn't been cold enough
Yet to change them much.

Only a few brave marigolds
Hang on and bloom,
And the mums are starting
To dominate.

This is the season of not-quite.
Not really hot enough to be Summer,
Not nippy enough yet to be Autumn,
Even though the calendar says it is.

I am SO ready for the shorter, cooler days,
The symphony the wind in dry leaves plays,
The rough bluster of the weather
And being able to wear a sweater.










Listening To Silence
By Carolyn Kay Armistead
September 2014

And silence
Is the loudest
Thing there is.
Blocking out hope
Enforcing barriers
Covering all
And nothing.

But sometimes
It is necessary
So we can hear
The quiet voice
And learn more
Before we make
A choice.

Rather than say
A word that may harm,
Silence is at least
More warm.
It leaves a comfort
That a cruel word
Removes
Like a scab torn off
Of a healing wound.

Yet silence can also
Fester
Letting miscommunication
Linger
Breeding sadness, anger,
Misunderstanding.

So. 
To let Silence grow,
Or to break it?
Much depends
Upon the reason
It is there.
Listen to the Silence.
It will tell you,
Perhaps,
What sort it is. 
Or your heart will.











Random Inspiration
C.K. Armistead
September, 2014

So much potential
So many words
And ways to use them
And yet
I sit. 
Nothing finds its way
Out of the circles in my head
And onto a page.
The sense of power
And mystery
I have always felt
When there seems to be
A verse, a story,
An Image
Just about to reveal itself,
Just almost
Within my grasp.
The trepidation
That reaching for it
Will scare it away
That the lovely thing
Will vanish
The minute my mind
Sees it clearly.
Such fear holds me captive
Most of the time.
It takes courage
To reach out with words,
To try to capture
The beautiful, fleeting image
Or the pitiful dark pain,
The vision many have seen
And described, and shared
That still must be experienced
Oneself
In order to complete itself
In order to join us all
In this soup of human experience.
We are so alone, really.
Closed up and singular
In our own minds,
In our own bodies.
Yet,
We dream the same dreams
Often have the same nightmares.
We need to share them
And learn from each other's
Experience.
Seeing that one CAN
Capture the vision,
Survive the darkness,
Wake to the beautiful light,
We NEED that.
But it is often so very
Difficult
To formulate
Our own piece
Of the puzzle
To share.
Fear stops me.
Holds me captive
Like a fly in amber.
Caught
Frozen
Incomplete.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

A Review of Easy Street (The Hard Way) by Ron Perlman


 Easy Street (The Hard Way) A Memoir
By Ron Perlman
Published by Da Capo Press / Perseus Books Group, Philadelphia, PA
September 2014




First of all, let  me admit that I have been a fan of Ron Perlman since 1987, when his acting abilities caused me to be enchanted by a certain Beast named Vincent.  I knew there had to be an amazingly good actor in there, because he made this character, that could so easily have been SO fake, into such a deep, complex, vulnerable being.  He made Vincent REAL.  He does that for a lot of characters.  Any time someone gives him the chance. 

From the very first pages of the first chapter, Mr. Perlman's ability as a storyteller is obvious.  He sets the scene very well, especially in the first chapter, evoking the time and place in a visceral way.  I was only 9 years old in 1969, but I remember the songs he mentions, and the things happening in the world. 

The warmth and humor of the man himself are evident all through the book.  From the jokes he learned from his Pop, to the chapter titles, to some of the stories themselves, there is evident humor.  Even when the events described are not always so funny. 

In this book he is very honest about the struggles he has had in his life, from poor self-image to lack of work in his chosen vocation, to finally finding out how to live comfortably in his own skin.  You can see it in him, if you've been a fan for years.  He's far more at ease in interviews now, there's a sparkle in his eye, he knows who he is.  It isn't just the experience of having done so many interviews, it's the ease he seems to carry with him wherever he goes.  

The vignettes about the other celebrities he has had the chance to work with and be friends with are priceless.  Very honest in his admission of his own awe and hero worship around some of them. 
Not gushing or gossipy, though.  Just honest. 

For longtime fans, the joy of familiar stories fleshed out, put in context, and stories never before shared is well worth the read.  Those who have not been fans, the man's honesty and charm will win you over, perhaps in spite of yourself. 

One note, if you are at all squeamish about profanity, you should know that Mr. Perlman grew up in a tough neighborhood in New York, and he makes frequent use of a word my Mom would slap me for using.  (Even now, and she's 90!)  Don't let that cause you to miss out on a great read. This is a wonderful, inspiring book. 

If you are able, get the audiobook, too.  To hear the stories in Ron's own voice, plus his impressions of a few people, is just awesome! 

Do yourself a very large favor and read Easy Street (The Hard Way)


Friday, September 26, 2014

Latest Music List Updates

Been awhile since I've done this.  I have added some of our CDs to my cloud player, and I have bought some new stuff, so here's what I don't think I have listed before:

50 Best of the 70s - (top 40 hits from my adolescent years.)
40 Most Beautiful Carols (Christmas music)
78 by China Forbes
All Time Greatest Hits of Neil Diamond
Andy Williams Christmas Album
Statler Brothers Christmas Album
Billboard #1's  of the 1970's
Bob Dylan's Greatest Hits, Volumes 1,2, and 3
Live Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays -Jimmy Buffett
Chameleon -single by Blake Perlman
Definitive Collection - Eric Carman
Dream A Little Dream - Pink Martini and the Von Trapps
Duets - Linda Ronstadt
Duets- Frank Sinatra
Essential Barry manilow
Essential Cindy Lauper
Popular Problems- Leonard Cohen
Gi' Me Elbow Room - Bonnie Rideout
Guardians of the Galaxy Awesome Mix Vol 1
Holiday Tradition- Canadian Brass
Invisible Touch - Genesis
A Jolly Christmas - Frank Sinatra
Long Black Veil - Chieftains
Mandatory Fun - Al Yankovic
Personal Christmas - Doris Day
Pure 80s #1's
A Retrospective - Pink Martini
Signed and Sealed in Blood - Dropkick Murphys
Silver Bells - Bing Crosby
Simon & Garfunkle - Hits
Sinatra Reprise
Jimmy Buffett - Songs You Know By Heart
Sympathique - Pink Martini
Synchronicity - Police
White Christmas -
Wicked Tinkers
Year Of The Cat - Al Stewart


Some Stories

I don't like to write fiction.  I much prefer poetry. I have, however, written a few stories that are mainly for children, based on stories I was told, or made up of whole cloth.  Here are two of them, my favorite ones.  The first is one I made up completely, the second is based on a story my great-granny used to tell my Mom and Aunt Margaret.

I feel this first story needs a bit of explaining.  It was written about a time and a place where women were not expected, or perhaps allowed, to be wage earners as they are now.  I know the story seems VERY dated and sexist for that reason, but it was written to fit a style and a formula that I was playing with at the time.  To fit in with other such tales I had heard and/or read. 


The Baker’s Ghost

By Carolyn Kay Armistead
1998


There once was a good woman who lived with her husband in a tidy little house somewhere in Scotland. They were an ordinary enough couple. They had a couple of weans that grew up in the wee tidy house, and they had a ghost. It was a bit odd, them having a ghost in that wee tidy house of theirs, with its bright sunny rooms and clean swept floors. But their ghost wasn’t the ordinary sort of ghost. This ghost was in no way frightening. Rather, this was a nice, cozy sot of ghost. He was a jolly sort, always wrapped in a white apron, and with flour smudges on his nose and cheeks.

The fact that they saw nothing whatsoever out of the way about having a ghost in the house leads me to believe that perhaps this wee tidy house was in St. Andrews. After all, I’ve heard the folks in St. Andrews set great store by their ghosts, or bogles as they call them.

Anyway, the good woman was known far and wide for the wonderful good things she baked. Her bannocks were heavenly, her shortbread near perfection, her cakes as light as fairy wings. Many folks wondered what her secret could be for getting all her good things to turn out so well. She would never tell, because she promised the ghost she wouldn’t. The ghost was a great baker in his earthly life. He baked for kings and princes so he did, and his idea of Heaven was a nice cozy kitchen to bide in, and to give a suggestion, or a bit of help when needed.


Now, time went on, and nobody but the good woman herself knew that the ghost was a help in the kitchen. The rest of the family saw him there from time to time, but the figured he just hung about, they didn’t know he offered a hand now and then. They may have wondered why the jolly old sort stood about in the corners of the dining room looking so pleased with himself as they enjoyed the good woman’s cakes and pastries, but they thought that was just his way. They never knew that some of their favorites among the good woman’s baked goods were made from recipes she learned from the ghost.

By and by, the good woman grew very old, and so did her good husband. They retired to a wee house in the country near their oldest son. Their younger son took over the wee tidy house, and brought his new bride there to live. She knew they had a kindly ghost about the place, and being a local girl, she didn’t mind a ghost in the house in the least.

As the new bride was helping her mother-in-law bundle up the last of the things they’d be taking to the country with them the lass confided that she hoped she’d learn to be as good a baker as the good woman herself.

“Och, dinna fash yeself about that, my dearie.” Said the good woman with a twinkle in her eye, “I’m leavin’ ye some of my best secrets. They’re here to be found when you most need them.”
The lass looked a bit surprised, but thanked the good woman prettily enough, and so the old couple were settled comfortably in the wee country house, and the younger son and the lass were settling in to life in the tidy wee house in St. Andrews.

One day the new wife was to be found sitting in the kitchen weeping over a fallen cake. Well, even though they were newly met, the ghost just couldn’t stand to see anyone having to weep over a fallen cake, so he spoke up to the weeping girl.

“Whist, now, what’s troubling you my lass?” asked the ghost, leaning over the girl’s shoulder.
She gave a little start until she saw who it was. She almost wanted to laugh at the kindly soul hovering there with his white apron and his flour-smudged face. “Och, I’m afraid I’ll ruin my husband’s chance for a better position in his employment.” Said she. “The man who runs the firm my husband works for is coming for supper tonight, and he remembers well my mother-in-law’s baking, and I know I canna do as well as she. Just look at this terrible flat cake I’ve ended up with! She said she left me her best secrets, and I’ve searched high and low and I canna find them anywhere! Whatever shall I do?!” and she commenced to sobbing again.

“Now, now,” said the ghost. I’ll tell you a wee secret about your mother-in-law, but you have to promise ‘twill be our secret now.”

The girl looked up at the ghost and agreed she’d keep the secret.
“Well, I was a fine baker in my earthly life, and I haunt this kitchen because it is a pleasant place for a baker to be about, and I am more than willing to offer advice and help. Many’s the time I stopped your mother-in-law from overbeating a batter and reminded her when to check the cakes in the oven. I’d be glad to do the same for you.”
“Och, would you?” asked the girl with a smile again, for she normally was a cheerful sort of person, and she had a bonnie smile.
“I would indeed my lass,” said the ghost, smoothing his apron. “Now, fetch me that big mixing bowl, and some sugar, and some flour, and the butter…” and on he went, giving directions, and guiding the lass through the baking of the cake.

This time, when she took it out of the oven, it was a high, light and lovely cake, worth of a king’s table. The ghost bid her go ahead and cook the supper whilst he frosted the cake. “Mayhap I’ll even help with the washing up, such a good pupil you’ve been this day.” said he.
So the lass cooked the supper for the man her husband worked for, and she just had time to tidy herself up before her husband and his employer were due home. As she came back down to set the table, she noticed the lovely frosting job the ghost had done on the cake, and that all the washing up had been done, so she could concentrate on being a gracious hostess, and not worry her head about the state of the kitchen.

The supper went well, and when she brought out the cake for dessert , her husband and his employer both had stars in their eyes, such a grand and delicious-looking cake it was. When she had cut them each a piece, and the men were saying how wonderful it was, the lass noticed the baker’s ghost standing in the corner and smiling with pride. She winked at him when no one was looking, and sent him a wee smile of her own.

After the employer left, and her husband went up to get ready for bed, the lass came into the kitchen and said ”Oh, thank you Master Baker! Mr. MacLendon as was just here says that he will see to it my husband gets that better position. “Twill mean more money for us, so we don’t have to be uneasy about the bairn that’s on its way.”

“I am glad to help, my lass.” Said the baker’s ghost, “And I like your name for me. Master Baker I was, and I suppose I still am! We’ll have a lot of work ahead of us in the next month, teachin’ you to make hard biscuits for the wean to cut its teeth on, and to make fairy cakes for tea parties, and all the things our husband’s mother used to make for him.”

The lass smiled again at the baker’s ghost, and wished aloud that she was allowed to give a ghost a hug, for she felt the Master Baker deserved one.

“Och, lassie, “ said the Master Baker, “Your loving thoughts are hug enough for me. Go on and get your rest now. We can’t let you get too tired! Would ye fancy French toast for breakfast? I’ll get everything ready.”

The lass went up to bed and her husband congratulated her on the success of her dinner. “I didna know ye were such a good cook, my girl.” Said he with a smile. “ ‘Tis as lucky as my father, I am.”
She smiled back at him and said “I had a wee bit of help from some of your mother’s secrets in the kitchen. She left a few for me.”
“Well, I’m glad she did. You’ve surely learned to bake a cake as light as any of hers.”
He yawned, fell asleep, and soon, so did the lass.


So it was that the lass and her husband also had a pleasant life in the tidy wee house with their own two weans growing up there. The lass took over her mother-in-law’s reputation for wonderful baked goods, much to the delight of the neighborhood. And the ghost of the Master Baker saw to it that no cakes ever fell, no bannocks burned, and no tea was ever without scones in that house.



Granny’s Nightcap

Carolyn Kay Armistead
1997


This is a paraphrase of a story my Great Grandmother Sarah used to tell to my Mom and my aunts. They didn’t remember too much about the story, so I made this up out of the pieces.


There once was an old woman who lived by herself off on the edge of a great big bog. Bogs are swampy, desolate places, and no one much ever came out to see her. That suited her just fine, as she liked her own company, and she was too busy with the few sheep she kept on the bit of dry land she owned to waste time with visitors.

One day, she saw two men walking along the path that skirted the bog. She thought it was strange that anyone would be out that far, and she really didn’t want to stop her spinning to waste time with them, so she shut up all the shutters, locked all her doors, and pretended she wasn’t at home. The two men came up to the house, calling out and looking to see if anyone was about. The old woman didn’t answer. Once they had decided that no one was there, the took themselves out to her barn to see what they could find there. The old woman didn’t like the way they were snooping about when it was clear as far as they knew that no one was home. They must be up to no good at all. So she hid herself in an old closet that had nothing in it but a heavy old pump handle and a whole sheep’s skin with the wool still on. (The old woman had been going to make a coat out of the skin, with the warm wool on the inside, but had never gotten around to doing it.)
By and by the two men forced the lock on the old woman’s back door and came into the house. She could hear them moving around, looking at her things. She held herself very still and quiet in her hiding place.
“Bless me, Jake, but I think we’ve found some old granny’s house. Look at all those little fussy doilies on the tables.”
“Aye, Tam, me Gran used to make things like that. D’ye think perhaps this granny hides money in her nightcap, like my Gran used to do?”
“Well, we might find out if we look..” said the other.
They continued to take things out of the old woman’s cupboards, and to make a mess of the house. They came into the bedroom, and began to go through her clothes. She was afraid they would find her in the closet, but she was saved by Tam’s hunger.
“Jake, there’s good meat here, and some bread, come let’s eat a bit before we finish here. No telling when we’ll have food this good again.”
“Ye’re right, tam, we’d best eat while we can.”
So the two set to eating the old woman out of house and home, and they found the wine and whiskey she kept for medicinal purposes, and began to drink rather a lot of both.
The old woman could tell that the robbers were getting a bit drunk, and that troubled her. If they found her while they were in that state, they were liable to do her some real harm besides stealing her food and what little money she had. She began to think about how best to be rid of them, when her hands found the pump handle and the sheepskin. She got an idea. She grinned a sly grin, and eased the door a little to see how dark it was outside. Good. It was just full dark. The robbers had drunk enough wine to make their eyesight a bit blurry, and she knew that the one lamp in the place didn’t make overmuch light. She started bumping her hands and then the pump handle against the wall of the closet. Then she moaned a low, mournful moan, like ghosts are supposed to make.

“Tam!” said Jake. “Did you hear somethin’?”

“Only this old house settlin’ for the night.” Tam answered, taking another drink of wine.

“But Tam,” Jake said, “What if that old granny is dead instead of just out visitin’ somebody?”

“Then she can’t very well hurt us, now can she?” Tam answered.

“Tam, ye know as well as I that the dead walk sometimes. My old granny did, and she was ever so mad at me for takin’ her money out o’ her nightcap,” said Jake with fear in his voice.
“Jake, ye great fool! Ye were asleep and dreamin’ about yer granny, she never came after ye.”
“Yes, she did, Tam. She did indeed, and it was only the dawn that saved me that time. I’d no be so lucky a second time.”

The old woman, hearing the edge of fear in their voices, snuck out of the closet. She slipped the sheep’s skin over her head, so that it looked like she was the great ghost of a sheep, and she crept out toward the men, pump handle in hand, moaning like the ghost of a very unhappy granny.

“Tam, I tell ye, she’s comin’ fer us. She’s going to get us, Tam , and take us to an airly grave!” Jake cried, hearing the new noises made by the old woman.

“Jake, I heard somethin’, and whilst I’m not so sure ‘tis a ghost, I’d still rather be away from this place.”

As they got up to leave, Tam gathered a few things to take with him. The old woman jumped up from behind the setee where she’d been hiding, and moaned “Ye robbed yer own Granny, oh, how could ye?” and she started towards Jake with the pump handle raised over her head as if to strike.

Both men were so frightened by the sight of her that they froze for an instant, until she started toward Jake with that pump handle. Then they dropped everything they had gathered up to take, and the both ran screaming from the house, right out into the bog.
“How d’ye like yer Granny w’her night cap on?” shouted the old woman from the door, laughing, as the two men disappeared into the bog, never to be seen again.


Some Thoughts on Many Things

You might not think so, but singing properly is a VERY physical activity.  It uses your entire body.  After a long lesson, or a good practice session, I feel as though I have had a pretty thorough workout.  A successful recital feels like winning a race or something.  Performing, and knowing I have done well, is a real rush. 
You have to train physically AND mentally to sing properly.  Posture is, of course, very important, for we all know how hard it is to breathe well if you are slouched over.  Breath support must come from deep in the belly, not just your chest.  Yoga breathing is the closest equivalent I can think of.  Singing well will develop a strong core, because your abs have a lot to do to help you keep posture, breath pressure, and therefore sound quality going correctly.

The mental part comes in when you have to remember how to make a certain note come out properly, and how a certain bit of melody goes.  I often find bits of arias wandering through my brain at random times, and lo, and behold, on lesson day, another bump in the road will be ironed out.  My subconscious, my voice coach says, has been chewing on it, and how it goes, and where it goes.

When a piece is particularly challenging, it can exhaust me to sing it through.  I feel sometimes as though I am bringing the sound up from my toes all the way to the top of my head.



So, this week, I've been on vacation from work.  It was our 30th wedding anniversary on Monday, and Matt took that day off, so we spent it together puttering around Bricktown.  Then we went to Norman for dinner, because we wanted to go to the Saltgrass Steakhouse.  It was a very nice anniversary.  I STILL cannot believe we've been married that long.

When I don't have an outside schedule imposed on me, I seem to drift a lot.  One day this week, I goofed around in my pajamas until after noon.  It felt wonderful.
I haven't done as much writing or reading as I wanted to do this week.  Just haven't felt like  it.  Can't settle.  Did several 1 hour sessions on the elliptical, and took quite a few walks.  I think the allergies and the changing seasons are making me uncomfortable and restless.
I also forgot to get my sister's birthday card in the mail.  So I ran out and got a late card today.  Gotta get that out in tomorrow's mail.  I'm just a sneezy, congested basket case.

Have been enjoying immensely Ron Perlman's memoir Easy Street (the hard way).  It is well-written, witty, and charming.  The audio version is a special treat, for not only do you get to hear Ron tell his stories in his own voice, you get to hear his very spot-on impressions of some of his friends and fellow actors.  He has not had an easy life, and his perseverance in the face of some pretty tough obstacles is inspiring.  I am trying to formulate a coherent review to publish in a separate post.  The problem is, I already admire the guy, love him like an extra brother, and this book just makes you love him even more.  He's so honest and forthright in it, painfully so sometimes, and his insights into the entertainment business and how it has changed should be of value to anyone pursuing a career in show business.

Today I got some of the Fall plantings done in the gardens.  Took out the spent marigolds, and added mums and pansies and violas.  Also a couple of dianthus out front to replace some that have died out.  The plants in now should be all right until the first hard freeze or heavy frost.    Should be in about a month, maybe less.

One thing Perlman mentions in his book is taking piano lessons for five years and never practicing.  Well, I did almost as bad.  Took for 10 years and ALMOST never practiced.  Learned to read music, and a good bit of theory, though.  I practiced my piano a bit this week.  VERY rusty, and the piano is due for tuning again, but I can still play, sort of.  (Arthritis hasn't helped the process any, even if it isn't painful, it has effectively shortened my accustomed reach by permanently bending the knuckles on my pinky fingers.) 

We were promised rain this week.  It never materialized.  I am disappointed.  I like sitting in my office and watching it rain while I read.  Sets the mood, helps me settle in and get cozy with what I'm doing.  Hope it doesn't decide to get stormy just in time for my trip to my Mom's.  No fun trying to get connections made when storms are about, and I can't drive home from Houston.  (Have to fly out of Houston again this time, not Dallas like last time.  Houston airport is confusing, but not as big as Dallas, I don't think.  I have a better chance of sprinting for my connecting flight and making it.)

Packing for that trip is another thing I don't look forward to.  Can't mail my stuff ahead like usual, will be taking a carry-on bag that I may have to gate check.  There are work clothes and work shoes at Mom's already.  I just have to take some regular clothes and PJs.  I hate to travel.  I am the classic example of George Carlin's bit about having to make a smaller version of  "your stuff" to take with you.  If you've never seen that bit, check YouTube.  I'm sure it's there.
In fact, Here's a link!

That's me all over.  Abject panic over being able to come up with a small enough version of "my stuff" in order to survive the trip. My Verizon tablet is a life saver in this regard.  I have a lot of books on my Nook and my Kindle apps that I can download to the tablet, and I can also download more on go if I need to.  The tablet connects to my wireless service, so I don't have to have Wi-Fi to use it.  Now I can travel with LOTS of books. I can also have access to my social media via the tablet or my phone.  (Can read on the phone too, but not as easily.)  I will also have an ebook version of Easy Street available to me.  It will be downloaded before I have to travel.  (I'm not an addict, I swear.  It's just that good, and so many familiar stories fleshed out and put in context is very helpful to a long-time fan.)

Hoping my singing voice does not desert me because of allergies or crud I might be exposed to on my trip.  I have several things I am working on, including a very amusing little aria that goes well with my Halloween costume.  I hope to sing it for my friends at a party, but we'll see.  The aria is in English, so people will at least be able to understand it. (Comedy should always be in the local language, my voice coach says...) 

Just so many things batting around in my brain right now, not being still long enough for me to deal with them effectively.  Life is often like this.  Just have to ride it out and see where I land.  It's usually a pretty good place. 

Saturday, September 20, 2014

Impressions of the Denomination I Grew Up In



A Sunday School attendance pin, like one I received for perfect attendance.
Say "Presbyterian" these days, and people likely think of a relatively bland group of pleasant people.  Some may think of that as the only Protestant denomination they know the actual name of.
I grew up in two Presbyterian congregations.  Both suburban, both middle class.  In both places, there were old Scots who were concerned about the budget, and the mission field, and whether or not we were educating the young people in the right way.  In both there were Scandinavian families, who were similarly concerned.  In both there were also families like ours that were going along as best we could.

Predestination, or the idea that it is determined even before our birth that we will be saved or not, used to be a big doctrine associated with Presbyterians.  Not so much anymore.  They will grant that God may have known ahead of time, but the choice is freely our own.  The modern denomination is more diverse, and rather less Calvinist than it used to be, at least from what I've seen.

A favorite description of Presbyterians is "God's Frozen Chosen.'  Yes, pretty much they just sit there during the service.  Maybe they'll stand to sing a hymn, and maybe they'll take part in a responsive reading, but really, they mostly just sit there.  Very still.  OR ELSE.  (That last is from my Mom.)
I learned a great deal about the Bible from growing up in Presbyterian Sunday School.  I memorized very large chunks of it, in fact.  We also learned history, and about the culture of the world at the time.  (It was deemed important that we have a good context in which to place the knowledge we received.)
 I know a great many good people  who are quietly going about doing God's work here on earth as Presbyterians.  I left because in so many congregations, the liturgy is being lost.  Services are far too "modern" for my taste, and the sense of continuum had gone.  Also, my husband was not raised Protestant.  He is Episcopalian, which isn't ROMAN Catholic, but is still not Protestant.  I became an Episcopalian officially after we moved here to Oklahoma, and found St. Paul's Cathedral.  THIS is a diverse congregation that all love each other and work well together in spite of how different we are.  The Episcopal church is like that.  Very inclusive, very tolerant, and NOT opposed to people having a good time. (Some call us Whiskeypalians, but that is a bit of an exaggeration.  It's usually boxed wine at church parties...)

You see, most Presbyterian churches, much more so when I was growing up, are rather against the idea of people having fun.  The denomination is at its roots Calvinist, and well, Calvinist belief seems to say that if you're enjoying life, you're doing it wrong.  "You have to bear the cross to wear the crown" is a favorite saying in the old line Presbyterian churches.  In fact, you will see the cross and crown emblem carved into the cornerstones of old churches.  They have changed the denominational symbol in recent years, but all through my youth, it was the Cross and Crown.  (Though many other denominations also use that symbol, also.)
Now, don't go believing all Presbyterians are dour old Calvinists.  As I said, the church in this modern era has loosened up quite a bit.  The last Presbyterian minister I had was an Air Force chaplain, who also became a friend.  He is very witty, and not the least bit stodgy, and not opposed to enjoying life.  (His major flaw is a great affinity for puns.  Awful ones.)

These are just my impressions, having grown up in two Presbyterian churches, and having visited MANY in the course of trying to find a place to worship with my husband.  We were married in the Episcopal church because they would let us have champagne at the reception.  Also, because we both love the liturgy and sense of history and connectedness to all that came before that is such a part of Episcopal worship. We have been members in good standing at St. Paul's since 1995.  I was confirmed in 1998, I think.  It was around then, because we were back in the cathedral itself after the rebuilding from the Murrah Bombing.

I will always be grateful for the great foundation in my faith that I learned in the Presbyterian Church.  That beginning allowed me to look honestly at the places available to worship, and make my decision based on what would provide the best environment in which to practice what I believe.
Your mileage may vary.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Futzing Around On A Friday Night

So, it's been awhile since I felt really moved to write something for this blog.  Ideas will present themselves, but at VERY bad times.  Like when I'm in the middle of work, with two customers waiting for me to go get their books on hold, and check them out for them.

So, while I'm goofing around this Friday night, let me tell you how this week has been.
Kinda crummy, actually.  Found out ALL of my friends got an item we had all ordered already, when mine didn't even have a ship date set.  (Turns out I hadn't ordered what I thought I had when I thought I had.  Have now fixed that, said item will be here next week.)  I felt irrationally left out and childish.  Then I realized it was all my fault.  I hadn't ordered mine from the same place after all!
Work was another source of weirdness, and on Tuesday, crumminess.   The building is technically closed because we are having some minor remodeling done.  We had a small version of our library services available in one of the meeting rooms.  By today, it was working pretty well.  Tuesday it was full of bugs.  TOO MANY PEOPLE showed up too close to closing, with inadequate staff to handle all their requests in a timely and efficient manner.  This was successfully communicated to our supervisor, who made some modifications, and by today, things were going pretty smoothly.  The folks who happened by were very grateful to us for having the services we had available.  Many hadn't paid attention to the publicity about the closing, and didn't realize we wouldn't REALLY be open.  To be able to check their email, pick up their holds, or make a copy of something or fax something was of immense value to them.  We were profusely thanked, even when it appeared that we didn't know if we were coming or going. (Truthfully, on Tuesday we didn't!)

All external factors aside, I've had the worst bout of allergies EVER. I almost lost my voice, I've been living on Muscinex and Chlor-tabs.  It is finally starting to get better, but it has been driving me NUTS!

On to other things:
Fall is finally in the air,though the equinox is ten days away.  I know that because our wedding anniversary is on the day of the autumnal equinox.  September 22.  My husband chose the date, don't look at me.  So, in 10 days we will have been married 30 years.  Does NOT seem possible.  We can't possibly be old enough to have been married that long. We still have a similar sense of humor, and that causes us to start chuckling about something long before others catch on, usually.  (We have many "in" jokes, just between us.)

I have no illusions about the cool weather lasting very long.  This IS Oklahoma, after all, but it was nice to be able to wear a sweater today.
This will have to be completed in the morning.  It has become rather late.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

So much for good intentions. Saturday was a day of good food, good friends, and football. 
So many things in this life we mean to do and never get around to.  In this case, I think I chose wisely.  Is it not better to choose to spend time with people you love than to spend time staring at a screen?  (Especially one with an annoyingly blank  page on it. )

Today was first filled with church, as Sunday usually is.  Bishop was there, preached a VERY good sermon.  Anthem went well, as did the descants on the hymns.
Next, we came home and I did laundry.  Yes, every weekend I must do laundry.  We do need clothes to wear all week, ya know. 
Next weekend I will no doubt be whiny and self-pitying.  I have to work both Saturday and Sunday.  Very rare that this should happen, but alas, it has.  Here's hoping my customer service skills hold up.  My job is very important, though it is but a small one.  I have had the rare privilege of being able to make someone's day better, and I take that very seriously.  Always want to live up to my faith and my ideals by being kind to all people, and being as much help as I can.  I fail at this more often than I would like to think about, but sometimes it is just because I don't know what to say or do.  Sometimes, my brain just shuts off.  I blame my age, but it's always happened to me.  My mind will wander off without me at the oddest times.  That's one reason I can't memorize piano pieces.  My mind wanders, and I have no idea what to play.  (For some reason, sung pieces are easier. )

Back to the Bishop's sermon.  Very interesting, and very challenging.  He spoke of a recent visit to the Holy Land.  He went to Jordan first.  Seems in Jordan, all faiths live in harmony with each other.  They all honor each other's faith, and celebrate many holidays together.  He said wherever he went in Jordan, he was greeted by friendly and helpful people, people of all faiths.  How different from our society, where anyone different is immediately suspect for some reason.  Our challenge is to obey those two commandments we hear every Sunday.  Really hear them, and really obey them. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your  mind, and your neighbor as yourself.  Every Sunday in our church's liturgy we hear these two commandments .  "On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets" ends the quote.  Perhaps we hear them so often because though they sound so simple, they are so very hard to keep.  We need the reminder.  Constantly and consistently.  I don't know about you, but many things get in the way of my "God time."  Constantly yammering at me from cell phone and computers and tablets, distractions abound.  If I can't make time for my love of God, how do I expect to be able to love myself OR my neighbor?  It's all connected, you see.   Anyway, this is what the Bishop's sermon has had my brain chewing on off and on all day.
The over-arching message of God to His people, in my experience anyway, is LOVE.  Love is what is most important, love is what lasts.  We are made to love and be loved.  We need each other, and we often forget this.  We isolate ourselves more and more in this world.  There abide in this world loving and openhearted people,and I have been very fortunate to meet many of them.  Both in "real" life, and online.  You can show others your love without being pushy, or mushy, or creepy.  It happens every day.  In small gestures, in shared smiles, in asking how it's going, opening a door for someone.  All small things, but think about how those small things make you feel, whether you're doing them for someone else, or someone does one of those small kindnesses for you.  It makes you feel good.  It lifts your heart.  Makes the day seem a little brighter, the prospect less bleak.  That's love.
Those little online hellos from far-flung friends, the gentle banter we share, the shared interests, all of those are little messages of love floating out into the world to multiply and make it better.
So, I guess that's one way of saying that even my distractions can be used for good.  Hmmm. 

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

With A Voice Of Singing...

"With a voice of singing declare ye, and tell this; utter it even to the end of the earth. Hallelujah!" - from the anthem "With a Voice Of Singing" by Kenneth Jennings



The Reading of the Gospel, sometimes sung, in the midst of the people.


The lyric above is from a choral anthem that we have sung at St. Paul's Episcopal Cathedral on a few occasions.  It is a lovely anthem, has some beautiful harmonies in it.  Matt and I have been in the Cathedral Choir since July of 1995.  We tried out for the choir at the urging of another member. We had been attending regularly since the bombing of the Murrah Building in April.  We had attended sporadically before that since we had arrived in Oklahoma in June of 1993.  When the bombing happened, so close to the church, we decided that we had better get ourselves back in the habit of regular church attendance, and we should make ourselves useful members of the congregation.
So, for almost 20 years, we have been with these gifted musicians, week in and week out, over every major holiday, singing and being blessed in doing so.

When you sing with someone for many years, your voices blend, merge, fill in the gaps for one another almost seamlessly.  Lou and I have been singing next to each other for 18 years now, and we sound like one voice when we sing together.  Leah hasn't been with us as long, but already she is blending with us so well that we still sound like one voice.  Many times now, I will sing 1st with Leah, and Lou will sing the 2nd Soprano line with Mary.  Such long association even helps with harmonies.  It's like we can feel our way around each other and the music somehow.

Our rehearsal this evening was a wonderful reaffirmation for me of how much I have learned, and how well we all work together.  Most of the pieces were familiar, and we picked them right up.  The one that we more or less sight read was not as difficult as we thought it might be.  All still need practice and polish, but we knew what we were supposed to sing, and could find the notes. And I did this with a scratchy throat from allergies.  I have decided it isn't a cold, because antihistamine makes it almost completely go away.  Colds are unfazed by the antihistamine usually. Also, the grass and ragweed pollens are off the scale this week.  I wasn't always so sensitive to them but since they tested me, and I came up slightly sensitive, I'm feeling like maybe I'm now MORE sensitive to those pollens.
At any rate, I am very grateful to still be able to sing.  Singing makes me feel so good, lets my spirit soar, and when I lose my voice, it is extremely frustrating.  Not just for the progress I lose in my voice training, but for the fact that I cannot let myself soar with the music when my voice is gone.  I miss the communion of sound when we sing with the choir, I can't bear to be in church if I can't sing.  Singing is such a big part of our worship in the Episcopal Church.

Our church has an entire page of the website devoted to our music.  Here are a couple of things from that page:

O Come Thou Sweet Redeeming Fire  sung by our Cathedral Choir.  (Lou and I were singing First Soprano.)

A photo of Lou and I in the loft singing :