Advent Journal - Day 6 : Today I Am Greatful For Music

Music has always been a part of my life.  I fell in love with singing at Sunday School.  I have been in church choirs since the age of 5.  I took piano lessons for 10 years.  I never got very good at playing because I never practiced enough.  My real motivation was to learn to read music.  (And that is easier when you have an instrument like the piano to relate to.) 
I take voice lessons now.  I have for more than eight years now.  There is always something new to learn about a voice, especially your own.  I have discovered a depth of  sound that I never thought I could produce.  The technique isn't easy when you are learning it, but the results are worth the hard work!  (And it IS work to sing well, it only LOOKS effortless.)

So many songs run through my head all the time.  When I am fretting over something, I will often hear the refrain of an old hymn running through my mind.  Usually,, it is very appropriate to what I am fretting about, and usually, it makes me feel better.  I call that phenomenon Holy Spirit Radio.  The Spirit supplies the message I need to hear by sticking a hymn in my brain. 
Whatever anthem we are working on in choir that seems to need attention, I will find that running through my head a lot, also.  There are arias I have worked on that continuously show up.  Non Mi Dir, Deh Viene Non Tardar, Les Oiseaux, , the Trees on the Mountain, to name a few.  My head seems to constantly have music playing somewhere in the back ground.  Strangely enough, I don't listen to music much at home any more.  Perhaps it is because the world at large is so full of sound that I like a bit of quiet at home, or perhaps it is just too difficult to decide what I want to listen to when there are SO many choices in my collection.
Music can set a mood, it can lift spirits, it can get people moving, or it can lull them to sleep.  Music can be a cultural identifier.  (Bagpipe music, for instance.  You know immediately that there are Scots around!) 
Singing means so much to me.  I feel I can get lost in the music, become part of the sound, my whole being is an instrument.  To sing well, it makes me feel alive!  That is why I get so testy when I have a cold and lose my voice.  I NEED to sing! (Also, I think about the progress I have made in recent lessons, and fret over the lost ground that will need to be made up when the voice is back enough to use.)  I am always praying that I don't catch a cold close to a singing occasion.  So, I better not have a cold anytime in the next two months!  I have choir every Sunday, an Evensong AND a recital on the 19th, then of course the special Christmas services, and then there is a special Evensong in January.  I really need my voice to be here and in good shape until all that is over.  If I can]t practice, I won't perform well, and I really would rather perform at my best.

I am so grateful for music, for all the composers and lyricists, for all the musicians over the centuries that have made the very air rejoice with the sound of their music!
The ladies in the photo above are from the Handbell Choir at St. Andrew's Catholic Church in Moore, OK.

Advent Day 5 - Today I am Thankful for my Husband

Today, more decorations went up around the house, and the cat snoozed through it. 

Today, in thinking about what I have to be thankful for this Advent, I thought how fortunate I am to have my husband.  Matt and I have been married for more than 26 years now, and it is still a very good thing to be married.  Matt is my best friend, the one who can always make me laugh, the one who puts up with almost ALL of my crap.  He's the one who expects the best of me, and unlike my parents, doesn't make me feel like pond scum if I miss the mark. 
Matt is a very accomplished person.  He hasn't had as much formal education as I have perhaps, but he has taught himself more than you would expect any human being to be able to master on their own.  He remembers most of whatever he reads, and can pick up new software programs faster than anyone I have ever seen.
A few years ago, Matt had a health scare.  I could have lost him then, but God was merciful, and Matt is able to function pretty much normally.  (Well, as normally as he EVER HAS functioned!)  (We met in a Star Trek fan club.  We are NOT normal!)  Since that time, Matt has had to deal with things that would drive me insane, but he handles it pretty well.  He has gained a lot of weight because he had to take steroids for awhile, and at our age, any weight that shows up almost NEVER leaves, no matter what you do.  (Doesn't help that we both love to cook and eat!)
Matt has such incredible focus when he is involved in a project.  I can never stick with something that intensely.  I wander off and do something else for awhile.  Sometimes his focus borders on obsession, but I have my own obsessive behaviors, so I really can't complain TOO much. 
We have a very nice life together, Matt and I.  We share so many interests:  music, cooking, gardening, our faith, and our friends. 
I'll tell you another reason I am so grateful to have Matt in my life.  He was fully prepared to cook dinner this evening.  I had something easy planned, and he agreed that he wanted to eat that, too, so I guess he'll get to make me a late supper tomorrow when I get back from the Gala at the library. 
Oh, yes.  He also puts up with all my Advent decorating and other projects, even the ones that make work for him.  (Like hanging up the outdoor lights.)

Day 4 - I am thankful for my church

I started to write about music today, but instead things have been bringing my thoughts back more specifically to my church.  Matt and I are in the Cathedral Choir at St. Paul's.  Have been since July of 1995.  Matt sings Baritone/Bass, and I sing first Soprano.  That's a lot of years of liturgy and song.  A lot of years with most of the same people week in and week out.  They are like family, and indeed, we spend all our major holidays with them! 
The choir is a wonderful group of people, but the whole church family is that way at St. Paul's. 

I was reminded of this again today when the Friends of the Library representative was asking the name of the man playing Santa at our Gala this year.  It is a gentleman who has been a member of St. Paul's FAR longer than we have.  He grew up in the parish.  He will make an excellent Santa, as he is kind, and usually of cheerful mien, and he is, well, round.  I called the church office to confirm the correct spelling of this gentleman's name so the Friends could get a little token of appreciation for him.  (That was our Friends lady's mission at the library today.) 
That our church, even though the parish is 10 miles away in Oklahoma City, could touch so many lives right here in Moore, is very telling.  Not only is the love in our church abundant, but the size of this metropolitan area is largely an illusion.  There are ties of friendship and kinship all over this area. 
I have written essays about St. Paul's in the aftermath of the Murrah Building Bombing.  Those can be found on my Face Book notes, if you are on my friends list.  It is still very true that love is in the very buildings there.  So many years of liturgy, song, and prayer.  Caring for one another and worshiping together, and praying for one another year after year, we and our predecessors have sanctified that place. 
Tonight we go to choir rehearsal, once more with our choir family, preparing to enrich worship for our larger church family.  Some weeks, rehearsal is difficult, because I am tired, and my voice isn't at its best, but usually the music Scott chooses makes the cares of the day go away.  The texts and settings we sing are beautiful and challenging, both musically and spiritually.  What seemed like a chore often becomes a very uplifting experience.
My Advent prayer for you is that you have a spiritual home as loving and as satisfying for you as St. Paul's is for Matt and myself.  (If you have a chance, come visit.  Corner of 7th and Robinson, downtown OKC.  Sunday services are at 9 and 11.  See our website www.stpaulsokc.org.)

Day 3 - Today I am Thankful For My Community

So many things go on behind the scenes, and often in plain sight, to keep a community going.  You may see the trash trucks going around, maybe even are annoyed if they come early enough to wake you up.  Your mail appears day after day, you turn on the faucet and there is clean water, the waste water all goes off to be treated and sent safely back into the environment.  You have streets and maybe sidewalks to use, there are traffic signals so you can be safer on the road, there are public buildings (like your library!) that you can use, and if you have an emergency, you know you can count on help from firefighters, police officers and/or ambulance crews.
There are legions of people, some visible, some not so visible that make all these things we take for granted possible.  I am very grateful to all those who work so hard so that the rest of us can have a pleasant community to live in.
Equally important are the  people who keep the whole thing running by being responsible to make the decisions on how tax dollars are spent, by voting on behalf of us to determine the best way to keep the community going.  These people are our elected officials, and in some cases, government employees.  We often forget about our city council members, our mayor, our state representatives, even our federal representatives when elections are over.  (Or unless something happens that makes us angry)  I try to let my elected officials know that I appreciate the job they are doing.  Especially our Mayor, Council, and City manager here in Moore.  They have done a LOT for this community in the last few years.
So for today, let me say thanks to a few of them I know: 
From our City Council:  Kathy McMillan,  our city manager, Steve Eddy, Our Mayor Glen Lewis, Our Building Maintenance folks:  Greg, Mark and Callie.  Our sanitation workers- We seem to have a different crew all the time lately, but they all do a good job.
From our police department:  Ted, Jerry, and Daniel. 
Thanks to our postal carriers, both the regular route person out here, and our library route person.
 Thanks to the firefighters- guys, we will miss having you hang out next door at the community center now that they are building you your own gym...
Thanks to all the city crews who keep the sewers running, the water flowing, and the traffic signals working.  Thanks to the road crews who keep an eye on street problems.
And thanks to all the store clerks, newspaper carriers, UPS and FedEx drivers who contribute to the working of the community.
I feel very fortunate to live in a major metropolitan area that still feels like a small town.  This is due in part to the professionalism and attention to detail of our city government and its employees.   It is also due to the overall kindness and good nature of most folks around here. 

If you see me out around town, and think I look familiar, smile and say hi, you've probably seen me in the library!

Advent - Day 2 Thankful for my Co-workers

Today I have been baking cookies for a couple of my co-workers.  Last year, I gave everyone at the library a card good for a batch of homemade cookies of their choice.  Some are just now getting around to cashing theirs in.  I have enjoyed making cookies for a specific co-worker each time someone has asked.  It gives me a chance to think about them and about how much they contribute to the joy I have working at the library. 
Our staff is like an extended family.  We all have to put up with each other, day in and day out.  We are fortunate that our staff functions well together.  We are a fun group, we know how to have a good time.  We also know how to jump in and get the work done when the going gets hectic.  It doesn't matter what the job is, someone will do it, whether it's technically their job or not.  We will all take our turn doing the mundane things that need doing.  Nobody gripes about it, either, it's truly amazing.
I really appreciate the attitude of my co-workers,  all of them share a desire to do the absolute best we can to have the best library ever!  We care about our customers, especially our "regulars", and I think they know that.  We will do what it takes to get the information or the book or dvd or audiobook that our customer needs.  (Sometimes this can involve a search of the work area; customers may need a little patience.  Library materials are very good at hiding in plain sight back there!)
The two I am baking for today are technically "substitutes", but they are in the building pretty regularly.  They both work in the other two departments, not in Circulation, where I work.  Still, they have been known to help people check out, to make library cards, even to help empty an overflowing book drop.  They are often the ones searching for needed materials in the back.  We do our best to take time to help, especially if we think we remember seeing the item in question recently.
Reflecting on the eleven years I have been at this job, I can honestly  say that I look forward to seeing my co-workers every day when I go in.  The building itself feels welcoming, and I think that is because of the positive spirit of the people I work with.
As we prepare for the holiday season, the library is decorated by the staff for the occasion.  (I missed out this year because we had other obligations.)  It is amazing what that group of people can do in only a couple of hours.  Here at home, Christmas trickles in a few decorations at a time.  Yesterday, the Advent wreath, today some towels  and the wreath on the door. 
Step by step.  Day by day.  Just like we get through the work day in easy times and in busy ones. 

Thanks, my fellow staffers, for being such a wonderful bunch of positive, helpful and inspiring people.

Advent 2010 - Day One

On this first day of Advent, the season of preparation for the arrival of the Christ Child, we were unable to go and worship with our church family. Matthew was ill with a sinus problem that we are afraid might be contagious, and I don't know if I might also be contagious and just not have symptoms. SO, our Advent is not starting out on a very positive note.

All that aside, my thought for the weeks leading up to Christmas was to write about something every day, if I can, that I am grateful for.
Today I am grateful for the characters in my life. These are the people who have left a big impression with their humor, their willingness to just be themselves, and their unique view of life.
The first real character that comes to mind is Nellie Holmes. This great lady was in her 90s and could still shoot a gopher across her back garden with a .22 pistol! (She NEVER missed!) She could quilt, can and cook with the best of them, but she really knew how to have fun. When I got to stay with her and her sister Maude when my folks wanted an evening out, Nellie used to make popcorn on the stovetop, and Maude would make orangeade. We would then either watch an old movie on tv, or we'd work on knitting or sewing projects and watch an old movie on tv. Nellie lived to be almost 100 years old, and stayed pretty spry almost to the end. She had many funny stories about her life, and how she learned to be such a good shot. (Her husband's job took them out of the country a lot, and into areas that were not particularly friendly to Americans.)
The second character that comes to mind is Miss Hunter, my sixth grade teacher. This lady had rheumatoid arthritis, and was often in pain. She still managed to be an excellent teacher. She had great dignity, and commanded our respect. (NOT an easy thing to get from 12 year olds!) She also had a great sense of humor and fun, and often made our lessons a great deal of fun for us. When some of us proved to be a bit slow at our basic addition facts, she came up with a sneaky way to encourage us to add faster. She told us she was going to Vegas on vacation and needed to practice her Blackjack. She taught us to play, and if you consider the game, being able to add quickly and make decisions based on what you see showing is the main skill in the game. She got us going and kept saying, "You have to add faster, girls, or you won't ever win!" Only later did my friend and I realize what she was really up to. She taught the whole class about statistics during the World Series. She brought her radio, and we listened to parts of the games, and she taught us to keep a score sheet, and she showed us how to find the scores and stats in the sports section of the newspaper to get the stats we missed because we couldn't listen to the whole game. (We could also check our work) She encouraged us to read the newspaper and to bring in stories that interested us to share. We discussed all kinds of news and sports and entertainment stories in that class. We also learned to be critical thinkers, to evaluate what we read and to compare information between news sources. (A skill sadly not taught, but even more important in this information-soaked age.)
The last character I'd like to talk about is someone I just finished writing a Christmas card to. Molly Manchester, a neighbor of ours when we were first married and lived in San Bernardino, CA. (DOWNTOWN San Bernardino!) Molly was living across the street from us where she cared for her grandma who had dementia. (Grandma used to get upset about all those people on the tv. "We don't have enough food in the house to feed all those people" she'd say, and want to take off for the store.) Molly had cats, and we had cats, and we used to sit on the front stoop and talk once in a while. Molly always got excited about the UPS truck coming up the street, and in jest, would say "Darn you, why didn't you stop here?!" when he went by without stopping. To this day, I think of Molly when the truck zooms up the street to someone else's house. Now, next door to us lived a couple that often had rather spectacular and LOUD arguments. They often "shared" them with the whole neighborhood. (Meaning you'd have to be stone deaf not to hear them!) Far as I know, they only ever hollered at each other, but they would bring it out into the front yard now and again. Molly used to pop popcorn and sit on the stoop to watch. When she thought perhaps they should be reminded that they were in public, she'd holler "Hey, you used that argument already. Think up something new!" They'd usually look surprised to realize they were outside, and would both stomp back in the house.
I am glad to report that last I heard, Molly was doing fine, living in a new neighborhood, and driving a school bus. (Grandma passed away peacefully several years ago.) She still has cats, and so do we, so Christmas card notes are often an exchange of cat hijinks.
At any rate, as we prepare for the coming of Christmas, I have lighted the first Advent candle, and I give thanks for all the characters who have enriched my life. I meet new ones all the time!

Where Is All the Time Going?

Ever have a day when you feel as old as Methuselah, and wonder how you got that way? I've been having several of those lately.
Kids who were just babies the last time I saw them are now grown adults. Doesn't feel like it was that long ago that I was watching them toddle around testing out their new mobility skills. Soon they'll be having their own babies.
My folks always told me to appreciate time while I had it, all too soon it will start slipping away, days passing so quickly that you scarcely remember them. At the time, I was just impatient for Christmas to hurry up and get here already, or for school to be out so I could sleep in and play late.
It is always hard to admit that your parents were right. These days, whole years fly by, and I wonder where they went. I still feel pretty much the same as always. but the face in the mirror looks like an old lady. (Let's not even talk about the spider veins in my legs and the skin on my arms where I have had too many farmer tans and too many mosquito bites.)
Also, I feel like I never get anything done anymore. There are always other demands on my time that keep me from getting my projects done. I never get to knit, or sew, or crochet, or do any craft projects anymore. I get to bake, but usually there is an urgent purpose behind it, and it isn't relaxing anymore. It's just one more demand on my time. I never even get to clean the house as often as I would LIKE to because I have other things I have to do. I do take time to read, but then feel guilty because things like the cleaning, or journal writing, or voice practice, or my poetry workbook are not getting done.
I have no aha! moment to share from this realization that my life is slipping away while I'm busy doing "other things". The only wisdom I can glean from it is that priorities must be set on how time is spent. My work for church is important, my job is important, because it is a vocation as much as it is a part-time job, my husband and our pets are important, perhaps most important, because they are my immediate family. My time on social media is not entirely wasted, because that is where I catch up with some of those toddlers who have grown up while I was busy elsewhere. It is also where I keep up with cherished friends near and far. Just about everyone on my "friends" list is someone I have met face to face. Exceptions are the email list friends that I have had for YEARS, and I have met a few of them in person, also.
There are also days when one just needs a little "puttering" time, time to do nothing much, time to ponder the mysteries of life and see if any new insight may be gleaned. That is what I try to do at least once in awhile. Unfortunately, today doesn't seem to have yielded anything profound, and now that my husband is up and stirring, I have to go do my Saturday chores.