Still Longing For Autumn, And It's The Middle Of October

Looking back at the journal again.  It's what you do when you write.  You try to salvage something from the bits and pieces your muse gives you every now and then, when it's feeling generous.
So far, I haven't had anything very long, but I have had a few bits I like very much.  I shared the previous gleanings, and now I'm taking a stab at the more recent words.

10/16/16

Some days Summer seems as relentless
In its grasp upon us in Autumn
As Winter does in Spring
As though reluctant to release its prize
To cooler days and chilly nights.
Much as Winter hates
To let us thaw in Spring's
Delights.













On delicate orange wings
The souls of the departed
Overcome many things
And soothe the broken-hearted
As they Southward wend their way
Getting to Mexico
By All Saints Day.

Or, as it is celebrated
 Dia De Los Muertos.
Day of the Dead
When graves are decorated
With favorite flowers and foods,
And even some small items
Depicting favorite activities
The families come
And have a picnic
And remember those gone before.
Life is celebrated,
It is not a mourning of loss
But a celebration of having
Had that person in their lives.
And the butterflies come
In their thousands
Every year
Souls coming home
To share the celebration.

10/17/16
Invisible
A poem about Beauty and the Beast (1987) For Cindy
 By C.K. Armistead
Often he feels invisible
The man inside the beast 
The soul behind the visage
Is human.
If any cared to look
A few loved ones know
They see him
They love the warrior/poet
In his soul.
But only SHE sees him
REALLY sees him
The noble poet
The ferocious warrior
The sum total
Of his burnished
Beautiful soul.
Only SHE sees it ALL
And loves unconditionally.

10/18/16

"Listen! The wind is rising 
and the air is wild with leaves,
We've had our summer evenings,
Now for October eves!"
-Wolfe

The above is one of the best  quotes I have ever seen about Fall

If only our weather would catch up-  
The wind rises all right,
But the temperature is too high
And not many leaves
Are aswirl on the wind as yet.


Bits of arias stuck
In my head
A throat too gunky
Yet to sing
Trying to loosen
Things up with medicine
And herbal tea
Don't know how successful
It will be
Hoping this is all
Finished before recital
Only singing one little
Aria
But I DO want it to
Come out as well
As I possibly can sing it -
I fear I sound far worse
Than anyone lets on
I don't think my pitch sounds right
When I listen to
Recordings - I sound flat.
At least to myself.


Yet another warm day
As if Summer is trying to say
I will not go- I refuse to budge!
Though Autumn stands ready
And Winter is a solemn judge.


10/19/16

When did personal responsibility
become a thing of the past?
Why do so many seek always
To blame someone else
for their mistakes instead of admitting
and learning from them?

Not my job
Not my fault
Always excuses
Never responsible
This generation
Accepts mediocrity
Instead of striving for greatness
Our parents felt
Obliged to sacrifice
For the benefits they enjoyed
Their generation
Survived Depression
Fought WWII
Won the Cold War
 Made the way
For all the good things
And Freedoms we enjoy
That we are busy
Squandering
By not being willing
To think of others
Of the greater good -
The needs of the Many
As Spock would no doubt remind us.



Cold quality to the late evening light
Soon our clocks will be set back an hour
To reflect this new reality.
The sunlight is golden, but pale
There are heavy clouds
But they do not cover the sky
They rumble with thunder as they
Sail by
While yet the sun
Does shine.

10/20/16

So long sitting
Need to move-
Alas, meetings.

  










10/23/16

I do hunger for food
For my body
But more so for my soul-
My spirit.
Something is lacking
Some voice needs
Strength
In order to sing.
A swarm of words
Batting around inside my head
Like moths around a light fixture,
Hitting the barrier,
But still striving,
Knocking into each other
Causing disruptions
Disconnects
Lost ideas
Fluctuations in the
Brightness
Of the light
That tries to shine
Through
To guide me out
Of silence
So unproductive
And into bounteous,
Joyous song.


That brings us to today.  When I sat in church, enjoying the liturgy as always, feeling part of something greater than myself, something ancient, ongoing, alive and vital still. 
Words and ideas battering my brain,
When I was constrained to remain
Silent
And listening.
Listening is good
Many times you hear what you NEED to hear
In that silence.
The silence where God speaks.
If only my mind would quiet down enough
To listen.



 

Thankful All The Time

We set aside one day of the year to gorge ourselves on rich food and remember how thankful we are for said food, and football, and family.  (In some cases, not the family, so much.)
Yet, wouldn't it make life more pleasant all around if we were thankful every day for something in our lives?  How about coffee?  I could see a whole bunch of hands go up in the air if I asked on a Monday morning, "Who's thankful for coffee?"  The fact that we can brew or buy a cup of nice, hot, caffeinated goodness gets many of us through the very tough prospect of facing the new day. (I mean, let's face it, some of us are night owls, and morning, especially EARLY morning, just sounds like a bad idea.  Especially if it involves leaving bed and having to think clearly.)

How many of us stop to think how very fortunate we are in this country that MOST of us can get up and brew that coffee, and have something to eat with it?  There are plenty who can't, even in this country.  Which is awful, and something that we need to work on.  (And think about those who don't even have a bed to sleep in, or a roof overhead.  On the whole, as a society, we are pretty spoiled.)

What about Wi-Fi? Or cell phone service for your smart phone?  Ever think about how many people can't afford that?  It isn't cheap.  Most of us accept the expense because it is so difficult today to conduct life without the smart phone or at the least, the computer with a high-speed Internet connection.  Sure, there are cheap, pay as you go plans available, but most people who are financially strapped can't even justify that expense.  I can see an awful lot of hands go up, my own included, if somebody asked "Who'd be lost without their smart phone?"
In the first place, I am thankful to be alive in the time when this technology is ubiquitous and useful.  In my youth, if we had told people that these devices and services would exist, they would have sent us off for mental evaluation.  They would have told us we were dreaming.  (They should have known better than to tell Star Trek fans something couldn't be done.  We now have communicators, we almost have medical scanners, can phasers and warp drive be far behind? Trek fans will always take up a challenge!)
In the second place, using the technology helps keep my mind sharp.  I need to be able to figure out new things quickly, and having the phone and all its multitudes of apps to master keeps me on my toes!  It has helped at work by making it easier for me to adapt to hardware, software, and procedural changes. 

How many of us take music for granted?  The background of most movies, tv shows, even life itself, as various places we go and people we interact with have music playing in the environment.  Music is a very big deal in my life, and something I give thanks for every single day.  Both making it and listening to it are joys that I cannot live without. 

Of course, everyone (or nearly everyone) says they are thankful for family and friends at Thanksgiving.  Every day, the people who must live with you, put up with your quirks, work with you, look at you, are there.  Nearly every one of them does a good job of living with you, making allowances for your quirks, and working with you.  Some of them even love you.  That's a wonderfully miraculous thing.  It's something I give thanks for constantly.  That my husband is always there, always loving me, that my coworkers actually seem glad to see me when I come in to work, that I have friends who willingly spend time with me, my life is so full and so rich because of them.  It makes me happy to try to give that joy back by appreciating them and being there for them no matter what.  (Though most of them are nowhere near the Prima Donna pain in butt that I am!  I'm the Baby, gotta love me!)

It seems there is a lot to be thankful for.  Perhaps one day to stop and actually acknowledge the fact is a good thing.  I hope it remains that, a day to stop and reflect and give thanks for all the many good things we have in this world.  It is in danger of becoming a day to either shop, or prepare to shop, for yet more stuff that we don't really need.  I am very thankful to live in this country, I believe our system is one of the best, and our history may not be untarnished, but it shows a people who learn, who grow, who change for the better, usually. I am concerned though, by the whole atmosphere we seem to be living in that seeks to divide people, categorize people, encourage people to keep consuming.  Some days I wonder if we have been transported to one of the many dystopian societies that were featured in the science fiction I read as a teen. 
When those moods strike, someone will inevitably post something cool and hopeful, or better yet, some little kid will show up at the library all jazzed to be there, and happy about getting books to read.  Makes my whole day. 
I am thankful for this life.  I do not take it for granted, not any of it.  Some days it's hard to express this. So I hope if others are like I am, that that they actually take advantage of the day set aside to be thankful, and reflect on more than just their overstuffed tummy or what sales they plan to hit.
Happy Thanksgiving.  I am thankful to you for reading.